Teaching and Learning

Jesus replied, "Very truly I tell you, no one can see the kingdom of God unless they are born again." 

- John 3:3

This one will be brief because I am pretty busy today, but I want to note what the Holy Spirit has revealed to me in reading from a study by Ray Comfort. If you would like to read it, the book is called "Faith is for Weak People" Responding to the Top 20 Objections to the Gospel. 

In the chapter addressing homosexuality, Ray describes the argument of gay people claiming they are born that way and how that argument can also be used to describe someone who commits adultery; they have resisted for years but finally gave in because they were born with that desire and had no choice. Then, Ray goes on to explain that argument is why, in order to resist this sin, we must be born again because we are born into a sinful nature. That's when it clicked for me; we are born into sin, therefore we must be born again so that we can be born into being free from that sin through Jesus Christ. I cannot say if I have written about something that the Holy Spirit revealed to me like this, but it was a powerful moment in my realization of this concept. Being born again is not physical, as Jesus taught Nicodemus in John 3, but it is a spiritual re-birth renewing our minds and spirit to be like Christ Jesus. When we are born, we have certain needs, wants, desires, etc. but when we are born again, those things change and Jesus becomes the center of our hierarchy of needs. After that everything falls into place because He can provide for us. 

Making my way through this study, I have been teaching, and learning, how we can respond to objections of the Gospel. I hope this explanation helps you, as this is something I have overlooked in the past, but being born again truly is being born into a new life, with Jesus. 

May the Holy Spirit move in you, and reveal what it is He wants you to know, that you can share your understand and faith with others. All glory to God, the one who saves. Amen.

Revisited

Welcome back. I think I'll skip the formalities here, and just get to the point. I don't always have a lot of time, so for the sake of me getting some things done tonight, I'll keep this one concise. 

It's the end of November, 2021 and almost 9 PM here. Our culture today is unravelling. The more "encouragement" I receive from Rex brings me anxiety yet also, motivation. He reminds me of the responsibility we have as Christians to stay constant in our faith and trusting in the Lord. For anyone who may read this and isn't a follower of Jesus, I'm sorry that I could not be more of a channel to you finding the faith. There is a God, and He loves you. The only thing He asks is that you love Him back.

Where I am at today, years later from my first post, is not far from where I was spiritually or [emotionally?]. I can't find the right word there. Yet, if anything has progressed in my character, it is my understanding of the need to preach the Gospel. I am learning that I am an anxious person when it comes to conflict or tension in, not only relationships, but also in conversation that may be a more serious topic. 

Addressing an issue is difficult, though I am continuing to gain experience there. Presenting a request is difficult for me. I am now engaged and will be married in about 11 months. I was very anxious about asking her father for his blessing, about asking her brothers for proposal planning assistance. I typically get anxious about a lot of things at my job. I have a reputation to uphold as a store manager, and I find it difficult... confrontation is difficult. That's it. I'm moving on here.

I am struggling to focus on the end reward that God calls us to in Heaven. I want to do my job, yet I want to share the Gospel, and any time I think of that I just talk myself out pretty quickly. Anyway, my point here is that I am not much further along in my faith journey after several years of light study and prayer. However, I don't want you to be discouraged. I would like you to know, regardless of you status of belief, God has a plan for you and he wants you to grow in your faith. We cannot afford to be stagnant here, especially now in the society we are faced with. Focus on Jesus, on what he has blessed you with and what God's grace has taken you away from. When we begin to understand the grace that God has for us, we begin to change and allow Him to work in us. He is working in me, maybe not as quickly as I expected but I know he has something for me. 

You are in my prayers. May God bless you and reveal the mystery of the Gospel to you. Amen.

Write and Wrong

It has been a long time since I have written anything here. I want to make this short but meaningful. A lot has happened since I last filled an entry, but not a lot at the same time. I have learned that I express my thoughts best when I write. God gives us talents and tools to glorify Him, and for me I find written words easiest to communicate with. I am still with the girl I bought a ring for. I am still at the job I started in high school. I am in a place of contentment. Where I need to be may be somewhere else, but for now I am looking to serve God where I am. Where am I? 

In my faith, not as far as I want to be. In my job, not as far as I want to be. In my relationship, not as far as I want to be. I said I was content, but am I wrong? I would say no. The flesh wants me to be discontent, but God calls me to serve Him where I am. A breakthrough would be nice. a raise would be nice. A simple life with a house would be nice. Yet God has a greater calling for us. To not be conformed to this world, but to be transformed by the renewing of our minds. To have life in Christ, a purpose, a fulfillment. Those things come with trusing and obeying Him before we gain our desires, so that we may be blessed and content in His purpose for our life. 

May God lead you to surrender the areas of your life that he needs, so that we may serve him the most.

Beginning and End

Let the words of my mouth and the meditation of my heart be acceptable in your sight, O Lord, my rock and my redeemer. Psalm 19:14

If you have been reading through my faith journey, I have not been witing as regularily as I would like. On such a note, I want this to be my last entry. Though that may be the case, I have continued to learn and grow in my faith in the last two years since I began this in the spring of 2018.

Much has changed not only in me, but also in the world today. Civil unrest continues to grow everywhere. The next presidential election is nearly here. The United States is in such a divide that many people are unsure as to what will come next. The one thing however that we can always be sure of is our Lord, Jesus Christ. Looking at my own life, I have certainly learned to lean more on the Holy Spirit and allowed him to lead me more each day. In my opinion, that is exactly what our nation needs.

As much as that is the case, I know we are at a time now, more than ever, when people are avoiding the idea of God. Yet today, I want to focus on the verse I posted. At the beginnig of this journal, I was conflicted as to where God wanted me. At the end of my journal, I want to ensure you, the reader, that I am certain that God has placed me in my job for a purpose. I will continue to serve him there and in my church as long as I am permitted. God allowed me to become the store manager of the grocery store I work for, as well as a small group leader of youg adults in my church. The youth group has been discontinued, and God has given me a small number of 20-something-year-old adults to minister to. Now, I do not have a degree in ministry but I do believe that the Lord has shown me a lot over the past few years that I can encourage others with. Not to mention, having fellowship with them allows me to learn from their stories as well.

God has certainly brought people into my life to teach me things; including a man who continuously encourages me to memorize scripture. Today, I wrote one of those verses as an encouragement to anyone who may read this. Let God be in your heart, and meditate on Him and his word, so that he can be your reasoning. With so much unsettled in our world today, having a God to give us peace in trying times is the only way I can see a positive result at the end of whatever you would call our current state.

Lastly, as I close out this journal, I want to encourage you that at the beginning and end of every faith journey for a believer, is God. He has always been there, and always will be. He is the God of Israel and, because of Jesus, he is the God of us today.

May you find peace in your meditation on the Rock. Amen.

Kings and Conviction

There is a time for everything... a time to weep and a time to laugh, a time to mourn and a time to dance. Ecclesiastes 3:1, 4

Though I have not been keeping up on this blog, my faith journey is well underway. I am learning so much about God's faithfulness and the history of man's faithfulness to God from the Old Testament. I am currently in the book of 1 Kings. Samuel, Sual, David, and Solomon have all passed on, and we find the kingdom of Israel divided under the reign of Jeroboam and his many successors to follow. The convicting message from all these kings is that we are not much further ahead today. We have idols and a misdirected faith in ourselves before we look to God. We are divided, hoping to gain whatever we can for ourselves and let those who are left make the best of what they have.

The problem with self-made idols comes especially when we let ourselves down. I have been there. God feels out of reach, and we are unsure how to handle the situation we have fallen into. There becomes a personal conviction for something more, but without God we can not be sure what that is. We have no clear direction or foundation to steer us through wherever we may be. In these moments of being overwhelmed or unsure, we should certainly turn to the Lord to guide us. (Especially during this pandemic.) Yet today, I am faced with an opportunity to respond to something in my own life. My first thought of a response is the third chapter of Ecclesiastes, when we are told that life has a season for eveything.

Though this will be breif, I will explain this season in my life.

After a prolonged break-up with my most recent, former girlfriend, I was able to turn things around in my faith and have certainly developed a better relationship with God. My time of being single allowed God to show me who I could be outside of a relationship, and that I had responsibility as a 20-something to my church and to my family. Currently, I am in a relationship (with a different girl) and I do believe God allowed her to be in my life for a purpose. Regardless of my relationship status, reading through the book of 1 Kings (and Samuel) has shown me the seriousness of not following your conviction to repentance. God allowed Isreal so many times to repent, especially after King Jeroboam, yet they did not. Thereafter, God brought judgment on Isreal by dividing the tribes, and allowing the kings to fight with each other causing many to lose their lives in such a short time. Though sin can ruin much in a short time, it may us take a lifetime of faithfulness to begin our relationship with God. That is where the challenge lies.

Today, I am certainly entering a new season of life; the door of "my" youth group is beginning to close, the door to my career is fully opened, and everyday I am learning new mercies and direction from the word of God. By understanding the book of Kings and conviction they must have had, I long to never be like the example of Jeroboam the sinner, but like the example of David: a man after God's own heart.

Though there is a time to mourn, there is also a time to dance. God answers the prayers of the faithful, and strengthens those in need... His mysteries are great, yet His glory is greater. May God lead you and speak to you through His word. Be encouraged by nothing but the power of Christ. Peace to you. Amen.

Sin and Boldness

Or do you not know that the unrighteous will not inherit the kingdom of God? Do not be deceived...
And such were some of you. But you were washed, you were sanctified, you were justified in the name of the Lord Jesus Christ and by the Spirit of our God.

– 1 Corinthians 6:9,11

Hello, again. Thanks for making it this far in my faith journey. God has really spoken to me this morning, and I know I need to write this down so that I can look back on this time and know that God does have a call for me. Yesterday, I made a choice that resulted in sin going unpunished (by me). Officially being the store manager, I now have a greater responsibility to the store and ensuring everything is as it should be. After finishing the books of Samuel, I have began praying for boldness in my faith. Since I have been praying more regularly, God has certainly been allowing me the opportunities to be more bold in my character. I also believe he has been preparing me to take a step in my faith toward ministry, even where I am in my own life. Changes will come in His time, but we need to be the one to show we are faithful where he has us now.

Toward the end of my workday, a man came into the store and walked out with two bags and a backpack full of groceries, attempting to steal them. A cashier caught him and alerted the closer, assistant manager. Being paged to the front, I quickly was told and followed the man out of the store to confront him. The two bags in his hands were emptied, yet the backpack remained unopened, as he was trying to convince us that he had illegal things in there, including "guns and needles" that he did not want to show us. After reviewing the camera footage, it was obvious that he did put items into his backpack and would not admit to it. As I continued to ask for his bag, he kept backing further away. To my own fault, I let him go with the backpack. Of course, I did tell him not to come back to the store.

What happened yesterday made me very angry, yet I went straight to God after the situation resolved. I went to Him hoping he could magically fix the problem, getting the man to return with the stolen items. Many thoughts ran through my mind; "why did I not call the police?" (usually it takes too long for them to get there, it is faster to handle the situation yourself), "I should have took the bag off of his back", "why was I not more aggressive?" were some of the thoughts that made me regret letting him go. I was very frustrated and was wishing I could find him to pursue the cause further, maybe to teach him a lesson. Yet, God reminded me that He is in control and will have the final say on His day of righteous judgement. I had to let it go, there was nothing more I could do besides prepare for next time.

This is where God really spoke to me. In the morning, the thoughts were still on my mind and I knew I needed to pray more. So, I did. I once again was irritated that this man would steal and lie to me, yet I let him go with the items. I was at fault. Yet I also let him go without the chance to hear the Gospel. Looking into how God views theft, the first passage that I found was 1 Corinthians 6:9-11, giving the reminder of our own sins and how we can help right the wrongs of others by ministering to them. God told me to dust off my feet because I did confront him, but the situation was already over and he did not give anything back. However, reading the commentary on 1 Corinthians 6 really showed me that God has the final say when it comes to sin. Yet, as believers, we have the responsibility to confront sin, regardless of who it is, and to show boldness in our faith so that the sinner may repent. God may not be using me to minister at the grocery store right now, but he is certainly using the grocery store to minister to me.

May God lead you in your faith and his calling for you, so that others may see his love through you. Amen.

Thoughts and Prayers

For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways, declares the Lord. For as the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts than your thoughts. – Isaiah 55:8-9    

God always wants to bring us closer to Him, yet we fall short because of our own vices. I have now finished both books of Samuel, and have begun to read 1 Kings. As I am still learning about God's faithfulness and our own ability to serve Him through the characters in these books, I have begun to pray more often for God to show me His own will for my life, so that I may follow it with ease. Yet, I suppose I am missing the point of these readings in the two books of Samuel, because David is given clear instructions to be king, yet he still finds a way to go against God's will. I suppose we cannot truly follow His will for us all the time, because of our own sin. Yet, God's grace allows us to start over every day and make draw closer to Him when we feel furthest away.

Lately, I have been less stressed about my job for a number of reasons, though I still have a cloud of frustration hanging over me. My thoughts get the best of me when I go to work, and I cannot seem to be satisfied with how things are run, how product is displayed, how the employees act, etc. It all brings me to a point where I seem to get irritated over minute details and lack trust in my coworkers to do their job properly. This frustration is something I do not want in my life and I have been trying to redirect those frustrations onto God, in my prayers that is. My thoughts and prayers are in constant battle when it comes time to pray in the morning; "I should just sleep in to get more rest, but I know God wants me to spend time with him" I think as I am praying. There are a lot of things I need to find a solution for at work, yet I only have an hour or so in the morning to be in prayer with God, so why do I need to worry about that now? I wish I could just sit down in the morning and be completely focused on God and be in prayer to hear His words for me, rather than my own grumblings. However, as I looked up a verse about God's way in our lives, the only verse that I was brought to was the one at the top, from Isaiah. We cannot know how God will work in us, yet we must continue to let Him turn our ongoing thoughts into clarity of His direction for us. We cannot find better advice from anything than the word of God. However, His thoughts and ways are not ours, so knowing when He is speaking to us is what we need to understand if we are to follow His will in our lives.

May God guide your thoughts and prayers so that you may have clarity, and peace, in His holiness.
Amen.

Lead and Serve

"For does not my house stand so with God? For he has made with me an everlasting covenant, ordered in all things and secure. For will he not cause to prosper all my help and my desire? – 2 Samuel 23:5

It will be two years by the end of this month that I began waking up early to spend time with God, and since I began writing this blog. I am not sure how much I have developed in my faith, though throughout my reading these past two years, I continue to learn about two main themes; how to lead, and how to serve. I have officially been an assistant manager at my job for some time, and unofficially the store manager because of my responsibilities while the owner is not present. I still currently lead the youth group at my church as well, though there is not much going on with that right now, considering the pandemic we are experiencing. Both books of Samuel follow, at first Samuel, and eventually David as he becomes king of Israel after the death of Saul. Though David ends up becoming the most well known leader of Israel before Jesus, he certainly does not lack the ability to serve his people and the God of Israel. For myself, I see David's example as an opportunity to follow Christ in the same way. Though he did sin, David grew up focused entirely on God's will that he would not fight back against Saul who was trying to kill him, simply because he knew Saul was God's anointed and God would deal with Saul. It was not David's responsibility to take out Saul, gaining himself the throne, when God had permitted Saul to be there. God had a greater plan for David than murder, and God also still had mercy on Saul until the very end of his life.

If God continued to show his mercy to Saul, who was trying to kill his most loyal servant (and disobeyed God in many other serious ways), how could he not continue to show mercy on us, through Christ, who choose to fix our eyes on Him daily? I wrote about God's calling on my life to lead in my first post, and my situation has not changed. I trust that God still wants me to lead these people because I am still where I am, yet I am slowly learning how to also serve them, in a way that Christ, or David, may have on the earth. The struggle is to continue to choose this everyday. God's grace has brought me to where I am, and I want Him to tell me where to go next, so that I may continue to lead and serve whomever He needs me to.

May God continue to speak to you in ways that only He can, so that you know where you are called, in order to serve Him and lead a Godly life as those before us have. Peace be with you. Amen.

Release and Renew

Today is Tuesday and after my last post, I realized I have been more recently writing about my journey through the scriptures and what they are telling me. Though God has been showing me a lot in his Word, I would like to take some time to reflect on how my faith has changed in more recent months. I do not have a scripture reference today because I want to look back at where I left off in my personal journey. Essentially, my faith has been solidifying because of my prayer life. I wrote a while ago about an idol, and the doubt I was dealing with. Mainly, those feelings I was experiencing were mainly related to a girl and the trust that I had in the relationship. Just when I thought I had everything worked out (I think she felt that way too), God took us both in different directions and I have not seen her since. From that time, I had experienced a closeness with God, due to me questioning him and my frustration of the situation. How could He not let things work out for me like I wanted? Everything made so much sense with her in the picture. That was the problem though, God allowed me to see that I was trusting in my own feelings and my own path for my life. It was all about what I wanted, and certainly did not want God interfering in this relationship since I was not putting Him first with that. The relationship ended simply due to God bringing us both in a different direction. Without me being able to release that burden to Christ, I would have never been able to renew my faith in Him and be where I am now in my faith.

As far a change in occupation since the first entry, I have not been given a new opportunity for a paid job and I am still volunteering (maybe more) time to lead the small youth group that God has established for me. My prayer life has been more focused on what he wants me to do, and I have been able to see the areas that I need to step up and trust him to carry out his plan for. Even though sometimes things do not work out the way I would like them to, He gets the glory at the end of each day. If there is one thing I always pray for, it is that He will continue to have the lead in the youth group, and the church that I am working for.

Lastly, I am in a different relationship (it has been about 6 months), and we both are more committed to serving the Lord with that more than myself in the last one. I plan to keep updating this with any job updates, or changes that God is leading me to make.

May God bless you and guide you in your ways, whichever way that may be. Amen.

Spirit and Conduct

And David danced before the Lord with all his might. And David was wearing a linen ephod. 
– 2 Samuel 6:14

As I am beginning to write this, the time is 6:14 AM. I still get up early (some days are better) and read, pray, and drink coffee before I start my day. I hope to encourage you with this post to do the same, because it has really made a difference in my faith.

I have been through 1 Samuel and am working on 2 Samuel now, after Samuel has passed and after Saul has passed. We are now left with (now king) David who is still a character of great faith to the Lord. I cannot say I have made it even close to the same level of faithfulness that David had on this earth, yet I know the Holy Spirit is working in me and my conduct has changed because of that.

The reason I referenced this verse is that God has been showing my through the scripture stories of David that a good faith really comes down to having God's Spirit and conduct. David could have stood around giving thanks to God, avoiding criticism from his wife, yet he chose to dance "with all his might" before the Lord knowing that it may look foolish to some. David was not concerned about his appearance toward other people because he knew he was praising God with his dancing.

Sometimes as a manager at my job, I am in situations where I do have to conduct myself in a professional way because I am representing the company. When it comes to representing the Lord, look to the scriptures for spiritual conduct. However, when we are worshiping the Lord, we are only worshiping the Lord, and we are not worshiping our social media presence or a group of people watching us. If you feel self-conscious or intimidated, think of David's example here. He was recently appointed the king of all Israel, and brought himself to this lowly point so that he could worship the Lord for the blessings he received. When his wife eventually told him not he should not have done that, he rebuked her because he knew God's Spirit was with him, and David wanted to conduct himself in a way he knew how to honor God; "with all his might", unconcerned with a public opinion.

May God guide you in spirit and conduct today, so that you may experience his blessings and may your faith not be hindered by those who judge you and the Father. Amen.

Flesh and Spirit

There was a long war between the house of Saul and the house of David. And David grew stronger and stronger, while the house of Saul became weaker and weaker. – 2 Samuel 3:1

I have read so much since my last entry, and even the one before that. The Lord has been showing me much with the scriptures that relates to my own life. Yes, even in the Old Testament. David was the king of Israel and this story shows he had much patience to wait for the Lord to place him on the throne of Israel (1 Samuel). Where I am reading, we find with David even being anointed by God and elected to rule Judah, there was division between David and the last son of Saul.

David, being such a man of God by avoiding to kill Saul (in defense) in many opportunities, represents the Spirit in this story. Saul, though he is now dead at this point, represents the flesh because of the multiple times he chose to serve himself over the Lord. The ending of 2 Samuel 2 and the first verse of chapter 3 have shown me that, even among the Old Testament people of God, there was much division between the flesh and Spirit.

Between my full-time job, and working for my church, I have felt this division in my own life. To some I say, "if I were not a Christian, I would be working every Sunday to make the extra money". Yet my belief in Christ allows me to see the benefit of having a day of rest, and to attend church where I continue to grow in my faith in the Lord. Though I do not have every Sunday off of working, I am working to change that and want to put more time into serving the Lord, so that I can show He has won the war over the flesh and so that I can fulfill my calling as a Christian.

If you are experiencing this division in your own life, you are not alone. Now, I encourage you to keep moving forward toward a more Christ-centered life so that others can see Him in you, and so that one day we, through the power of Christ, can finally win the war against the flesh.

May the Spirit lead you today, so that you may be closer to Him, and further from the flesh that easily entangles us from seeing what God truly has planned for our lives. Amen.

King and Counsel

When David had fled and made his escape, he went to Samuel at Ramah and told him all that Saul had done to him. Then he and Samuel went to Naioth and stayed there. – 1 Samuel 19:18

At this point in David's legacy, he had become favorable among the Israelites and king Saul. However, Saul had become less favorable to God, and therefore began to resent young David. After multiple attempts on his life, David fled to seek counsel from Samuel, a prophet and his mentor prior to David's time in the kingdom. 

In my own life, though I am not in a similar situation as David (fleeing for his life while anointed to be the next king of Israel), I have still been learning to seek counsel from the Godly people during uncertain times. I cannot say that I have felt discouraged in the same way that David did feeling betrayed by his close friends, yet I have felt discouragement not knowing what I would do in a certain situation. Despite my anxiety in these situations whether it was stress from a past relationship or a work-related issue, my faith has certainly been growing among the trials God has allowed me to go through. All praise be to Him who gives me strength. 

As I closed on chapter 19 and am going through chapter 20, God has been showing me how his Holy Spirit was at work in David's life during his time on earth. In any circumstance, God is able to work through a mentor or spiritual leader so that they can guide you (or me) in the direction that God is guiding us. As a word of encouragement from the example of David, continue trusting that God has a purpose and that He will support you in his will for your life. Know that the future king of Israel did seek the King and counsel from those who God put in his life to aid him. Eventually David even humbly receives advice from a woman named Abigail, in chapter 25, who helps him to look back to the Lord instead of his own intentions.

In the past two or three years (and most of my life), God has been working in my life in ways that I would not have expected. He has led me to understand how to be closer to him and to trust him more in daily circumstances when I am not sure where to turn. Prayer and scripture have been a bigger part of my faith and routine as I have learned to look to him each morning. I am at a point where I feel incomplete on the days I cannot set aside time to spend with the Lord, reading scripture or praying. In any circumstance, trust in the Lord and bring all things to him so that he may lead you in His glory.
May God lead you in all that you do. Amen.

Pride and Support

Then he said, "I have sinned; yet honor me now before the elders of my people and before Israel, and return with me, that I may bow before the Lord your God." So Samuel turned back after Saul, and Saul bowed before the Lord. – 1 Samuel 15:30-31

At this point in the book of 1 Samuel, Saul's right to be king over Israel has been taken away from him. God has had enough of his pride. Although Samuel had to deliver this message to Saul, Samuel turned back toward Saul, that his soul might be saved, if he were to truly repent.

In my own life, I'm finding the need to look to God more often as I grow in my faith. Reading the scriptures, on the prideful fall of Saul has shown me that I do not want to end up the way he did. Though I have not been given rule over an entire nation, God has put me in a leadership role at my current job, and it is easy to be prideful in that position. However, there is more to the story. 

In the passage, Samuel turns back to Saul in hopes that he will have meaningful worship with God, and that God may save his soul. In chapter 15, we find that Saul actually never truly repents of the sin that lost him the kingdom, yet Samuel grieves over that. Samuel is a faithful servant of the Lord, and not a "dispassionate messenger of God's word" (Trapp), meaning he knew there was value in support of others' faith, as little as it may be.

God may not have plans for me to be a great profit, as Samuel was, yet I know that (through Christ) my soul has been saved, and he wants me to set aside my pride and support the faith of those who need it. I will pray for anyone reading this; that your faith may increase each day and you may support those in your life who are lacking faith.

Before and After

Only fear the LORD and serve him faithfully with all your heart. For consider what great things he has done for you. – 1 Samuel 12:24


My faith has been growing, yet I am still experiencing "spiritual warfare" as some warn against. As I find myself leaning on the scriptures, I keep hearing more excuses in my own thoughts as to not get up early to read and pray. In the midst of a new relationship I find myself staying up later than we both would like to, yet somehow I still find the energy (most days) to get up before work to spend time with the Lord.

Before I began keeping this "journal", I was at a point where I thought things were going great and I had everything figured out. Little did I realize, God was at work to bring me closer to him. Though I am not perfect at serving Christ first, I have seen my desire to spend time with the Lord increase over the past year. I know that the only way I can overcome the desires of my flesh is by trusting in Him.

At first, I wanted to address a verse from 1 Samuel 13 where God tells Saul (through Samuel) that he lost his family's right to continue ruling over Israel. God informs them that he will find someone after His own heart, and not someone who is selfish like Saul was. God has a plan for us all, and intends on getting us to a point that we can serve him, yet what prevents us from getting there is simply, ourselves and our desire to do what we want before God's will.

Though it is not the easiest to deny our own desires to serve God, that is the calling we all have. God's will for us may be different in our circumstances, yet is the same in the fact that he wants us to "fear him and serve him faithfully with all our heart", and to remember the great things he has done for us. That is the main reason I started this journal. Though I may not be doing much different than leading youth, while working in a grocery store, I have learned a lot about the Lord, since this journey began.

May God speak to you through his Word today, and may you fear and serve him with all your heart.
Amen.

Wants and Needs

And the LORD said to Samuel, "Obey the voice of the people in all that they say to you, for they have not rejected you, but they have rejected me from being king over them." – 1 Samuel 8:7

The Lord always works in ways that are for our good, but only if we let him. This is what we see here in the book of 1 Samuel, when Israel is at a point where they want to be independent from God. Their wants exceed their needs... I read from chapter 9 today, and Saul is about to be appointed king of Israel, yet he is questioning to Samuel why God wants him to be king.

Today, there are a lot of people rejecting God in their life and want to do things their own way. I find that it is pretty easy to say we want something our way, and neglect to let God have full control of the situation. However, as Israel will find out, doing things "our way" does not always end up with the best results. If only they (and we) had submitted to God's plan in the beginning, all the strife could have been avoided from the start.

My wants included moving somewhere else and finding a girl I could settle down with, however after two dead-end relationships, I found myself right where I had been in the beginning. Now, after months of prayer and an effort to wait on God, I am slowly seeing things work out for my good that I would have not expected, all while staying in the same town.

Sometimes in life we look for change to avoid problems from the past. Yet if only we had faced them (with God's help) from the beginning, could we have saved ourselves from the stress we know now.

Sorrow and Love

Go therefore and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit – Matthew 28:19

Today I am beginning a study of the book of 1 Samuel, as I have just finished studying Matthew. With the intention of reading all four gospels, I could have been well educated on the ministry of Jesus. Yet the past few weeks, I have felt called to study Samuel after teaching a couple lessons in youth group from the book of 1 Samuel. I have been learning so much from the word of God these past four months, and God has brought me through the sorrow of my past and, until recently, I was unable to see the magnitude of His love for me.

My scripture reference from today is known as the Great Commission, given by the resurrected Christ to the remaining eleven disciples, in Galilee. It took me some time to finally get to this point, yet God has worked so much in my life following the sorrow brought on by my past. I could explain things, but as I mentioned in an earlier post, I want this to be less about my personal life than about ministry.
The sorrow I had was mainly from broken relationships, and unfulfilled promises. However while reading the gospel of Matthew, I simultaneously began to see the Lord working in my life and was able to be more willing to carry out God's will for my life. When we rely too much on other people for fulfillment of life, we will always be disappointed. Yet, when we begin to trust in God alone, we can begin to understand (and experience) the love that he has for us.

The passage I read today was 1 Samuel 1:1-7; setting the scene for the development of Hannah's faith through trials. Here is the main point: when God allows trials in our life, it is not because he wants us to suffer, rather he wants us to lean on him and be joyful for the work he is doing (James 1:2). When we begin to look to him, instead of our sorrow for comfort, we can finally start to see the work that the Holy Spirit is doing in our lives. Our sorrow can finally be turned to joy, and the living water (John 4:10) will begin to pour out of us... God has recently blessed me with new situations in my life, and I can only credit His love and the trials he allows me to experience for the blessings.

If you happen to be struggling in a situation today, or this week, ask God what he wants you to see in that, and to open your heart to the things you need to change. After all, when we experience discomfort in life, it is not because of the imperfections of Christ's love for us.

Old and New

Today, I read from the book of Matthew, where the Pharisees paid the Roman guard to lie about what happened to Jesus' body the night of his resurrection. If you're interested, it's chapter 28.

I have been posting a verse with the past few entries, but today I want to focus on one main point: redemption.

That's mainly what the Gospel is about, turning from our old ways and being brought to a new life in Christ. I think a lot of people never really get there. Sure, there are people out there who have been Christian all their life, yet still seem to give in to whatever the world may be tempting them with. I have been there myself. I have believed in God about two-thirds of my life, yet I cannot say that I have always followed Christ. Sure, I accepted His son for salvation, but I only in this past month or so, have I began to truly understand its meaning.

In my case, girls and popularity have always been a focus for me. I never had a lot of money growing up, so having whatever was cool at the time was never really an option unless I hung out with one of my friends who had what I wanted. Also, I felt that if I had the right girl around, everything would be great, yet I could never seem to make it work with them. Even my most recent, dead-end relationship, was supposed to last a long time, and she thought the same thing. Turns out God had different plans.

Today, I have a car that I bought for $800, I live with my mom because I owe money from college, and I just entered into a relationship with a girl I barely knew, yet she went to the same high school. However that stuff is not that important. The girl is great, and we get along really well. I have a good job, but because of my loans, I do not need an expensive car. Not to mention, I am capable of living on my own, though my mom offered me cheap rent, so I just plan on saving for a house eventually.

At the end of the day, I made some poor choices in regard to my faith, and would take them back if I knew what was coming, yet the results have brought me to where I am today. God has shown me so much in my life that needs work. I do not have it figured out yet, though I know there is no reason for me to have any of the old habits I did growing up. I have recently began to understand what it means to have a new life in Christ, and mainly because of my previous relationship, I was able to see the definition of that change in someone's life. She is doing well, and ultimately, I'm proud of her for being where she is. I cannot take back the choices her or I made, though I know God has used them to prepare me for a life of serving Christ.

Thank you for reading, and may God bless you in your life, as he has blessed me.

Faith and Reward

His master said to him, "Well done, good and faithful servant. You have been faithful over a little; I will set you over much. Enter into the joy of your master." – Matthew 25:21

When God gives us something, we have the choice to either use it for ourselves, or use it for His glory. It is not unusual to see ourselves, or someone we know, to waste the gift that God has given.
In Matthew 25, we read the parable of the talents (currency) and see how each servant uses the talents given to them. The first two who received talents invested them and doubled their return. The last, buried it in the ground so that it would not be lost. Each servant was given a reward based on their efforts while the master was away.

This past year or so, God has taught me a lot about faithfulness and how we truly can trust him through everything, though we still seem to neglect his love at times. If nothing else, I have gained wisdom from the Holy Spirit by spending an hour in the morning to focus on the Lord. There was a time when my faith was not in the Lord, but in my own desires. Looking back, I really lost my chance at ministry with some of the choices I made, and the people involved may never see the Lord in me. However, more recently, I pray that God will use me for His purpose and that he will help me to not focus on my own will, but on his through all things.

As the servants received a reward for their work with the talents, we will also receive a reward for our work with what God has given us. We are now in a time where the Master is away, but will return with the expectation of some result from his servants. We are called to serve Christ and it will take a commitment everyday to go out and invest our "talents", whether it be our money or our skills. When the Lord returns, he will look at our faith, and reward us based on our effort while he was away. Therefore, if nothing else, we must do the very least as to gain some interest on our "talent" (v27), so that the Lord will be given the glory. As Ecclesiastes shows us, nothing is worth our time unless it is being done in service to the Lord. Trust in God and seek the reward he has for you.

Faith and Works

For as the body apart from the spirit is dead, so also faith apart from works is dead. 
– James 2:26

If you know your NT scriptures, you probably could have guessed the scripture reference just by the title. On the surface, James essentially contradicts Paul's teachings that works cannot earn you salvation. If you want a better understanding of this "contradiction", click here for an article that might help. Regardless of who thinks either teaching is right or wrong, they are both right. This is the word of God and he does not contradict himself. In short, Paul is saying that the Mosaic Law (10 Commandments and OT traditions) can no longer earn you a spot in heaven. Rather, we have been offered the grace of God through Jesus' death and resurrection. That being stated, James is not disagreeing with Paul that God's grace cannot save us, rather he is continuing Paul's instruction. James teaches the reader that with the grace we have received, we cannot be on the sidelines of our faith. In order to show our faith, we must get in the action and perform faithful works as Christ did on earth. Hopefully by now you get it, because I would rather not make this post into a sermon (I almost did anyway, keep reading). Instead, I will give you some of my own thoughts on this.

Mainly, I am at a point in my life, or my faith, where I know I can do more but I seem to be settling in to my circumstances. I have been investing more time into prayer, and though I am an easily distracted person, the Lord is teaching me a lot during my time with Him. I think that James is a fitting book for me right now because I am looking at the facts that I am not really doing a lot of "work" for Christ. I work a full-time job and mostly put my service to the church second. After praying and opening the Bible to this chapter, perhaps God is really telling me to trust him, and move closer to serving him before myself.

Though that is the point of this chapter, I am struggling with the conflict of serving myself in this comfortable job, or trusting him to lead me into the unknown... Typically I end with encouragement, I would like to stick with that, though before I end today's entry I would ask if you would pray for me to be led by the Holy Spirit and to commit fully to God's will for my life over my own will.

Being on the bench, or the bleachers, during a sporting event never allows us to be involved in changing the end result of the game. If we live our lives simply waiting for God to do his work in the world while we watch, then we cannot truly experience the blessings he has for us when the final point is scored. James 2:22 supports that saying "you see that faith was active along with his works, and faith was completed by his works." So go on and trust that God has a better plan for you... Get out there and work for His glory!

Deny and Follow

Then Jesus told his disciples, "If anyone would come after me, let him deny himself and take up his cross and follow me. – Matthew 16:24

One thing I will note, my titles usually relate to different experiences or two different verses, but today, I will only focus on this verse. I have not been writing as much as I would like, yet I still find encouragement in these entries, as I hope you do.

The depth of this verse is not as deep as some may consider, though the value is great when it is lived out... ultimately leading to our earthly death. To better understand scripture, I use and recommend the David Guzik commentary because he has put a lot of time into developing that. Anyway, I have held this verse with me a while now, and find it to be something that I keep looking to in everyday life. Essentially when we deny ourselves, it is not self-denial where we are giving up things we want, like certain foods or activities, for a greater purpose (though that is valuable on its own). Denying yourself simply means to deny what you want in this life. Denying your will and following the Lord's will.

This is exactly what Jesus did when he went to the cross. At one point, Jesus even asks God to take away the responsibility of the crucifixion (Luke 22:42). Yet he knows that is what God needs from him to grant mercy on us, so he carries out his calling anyway. Personally, I doubt any of us would make it the whole way to the cross, whether we run away, or give up prior to the event. However, this is what Jesus is calling us to, and I have constantly had this verse on my mind whenever I am making a choice for myself. I actually bought a cross necklace to remind myself of the verse and though it is fashionable, I keep it as my own cross to carry. The necklace holds me closer to the Lord when I am reminded of what Christ has done for us.

More than anything, I hope to deny myself and follow Christ more, each day, until I am brought up to Heaven to be with Him. Christ denied himself and followed God's calling to death on the cross so that we had the freedom to choose our life. If one wants to serve Christ, they must expect the same result, giving up the glory of this world, for the glory of God.

May the Lord guide you and uphold you on this journey, so you choose to follow him.